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Archive for parenting

In Defense of Israeli “Rudeness”

My post, What Defines Israeli Parenting?, generated a lively discussion. Lack of manners among Israeli children came up again and again.

Yesterday someone named named Trudy left the following comment:

We spent our sabbatical year in Israel in 07-08. It was a fabulous experience. I agree with most of the observations/comments above. For me, the most striking thing was the bad behaviour of the children AND the adults who had obviously been parented in a similar manner. Don’t get me wrong. My children also misbehave, but the difference is that, when they do, I notice, I care and I act. Many Israeli parents do not notice, care or act. They are raising another generation of rude, spoiled children. I had visited Israel 3 times before our sabbatical year and, of course, I noticed and experienced the rude behaviour of both adults and children. However, over the course of the year, this aspect of Israeli culture REALLY began to wear on me. It was embarrassing, as a Jew, to imagine what non-Jewish tourists thought of “us” as Jews. They are not just seeing rude Israelis, they are seeing rude Jews. Many of the Israelis that I spent time with while in Israel were also embarrassed by the behaviour of their fellow Israelis and their children. The difference, in almost every case, was that the people I spent time with – family and friends – had themselves lived in Canada or the US.

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What Defines Israeli Parenting?

A journalist for an American magazine sent me questions for an article on parenting styles around the world. I know Israeli parents are not homogeneous, but please help me out.

How are Israeli parents different from parents in other countries? What makes them unique? I already plan to mention Bamba.

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Mothering Alone vs. Co-Parenting

I received this thoughtful email from a young mother with three children aged 4, 2 and 3 months:
I really enjoy all your advice and tips. You help me appreciate that all mothers go through more or less the same ups and downs and we can provide so much support for each other. I was wondering if you had thoughts on juggling being a mother and a “co-parent”. I know that is vague. I feel frustrated and am having a hard time even understanding, let alone expressing,my frustrations.

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The Walking Schoolbus

This morning on the radio, a father from Kiryat Ono was interviewed about a project in his school called Ha-Otobus Hamehalech, or the walking bus. Instead of having each parent walk, or more likely drive, their children to school each day, parents formed a cooperative to walk large groups of children together.

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On Bar Mitzvah Planning

People like to kvetch about the extravagance of weddings, bar mitzvahs, and other life-cycle events in the Jewish community. When it becomes real, though, doing your own thing is harder than it looks.

We just celebrated our son’s bar mitzvah, our third so far, and I have been thinking about why people do what they do and sometimes go overboard.

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Staying Sane with a Challenging Child

In Staying Home and Staying Sane, I gave parents strategies being stay-at-home parents. Readers asked me to expand the post to include tips when a child is especially active, social, or has other needs.

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Mikveh Calendar Site, Bringing Children to Shul

Leiv Esther reviewed MikvahCalendar, a new website for married Jewish women who use or want to use the mikveh. You can specify whether you prefer the customs of Chabad, YU/Rabbi Willig, or “choose from available options.” The site looks easy to use, but I could do without the flowery copy:May divine blessings of spiritual and material well-being continue to rain down and permeate your marriage and your home.”

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Empathy, Mother-Guilt, Shabbat, Career Skills, Anger, and Idleness

RaggedyMom showed me this CNN story about developing children’s social maturity. In a  fourteen-year study, the preschool children of mothers who described a picture using emotional language showed more empathy and better social skills when they got older.

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Tips on Staying Home and Staying Sane

Tips on Staying Home and Staying SaneHow can you stay home with your baby and not end up in the loony bin? Below list the strategies that helped me the most. I believe they are helpful for employed mothers, and fathers too—they are ways of coping with the intense demands of parenting and balancing your needs and the needs of your family. When my oldest was born I decided to stay home with him, because I believed it to be the best thing for my him. And I set out to make it the best thing for me too. Here are some things that I did:

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Abortion in the Religious Zionist Community

See below for an update.

In this week’s newspaper Makor Rishon, Yifat Erlich interviews couples in the national religious community who underwent abortions because of health problems with the fetus. Afraid of criticism from their close-knit communities, many ended up alone during this traumatic period.

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