Accompanying Emanuel Fathers to Prison

Update: It looks like the story is not over yet. The rabbinic court said it did not receive notice that Lalom revoked his lawsuit. It criticized him for going to the secular court, and claimed that it never said there was racism. The letter can be seen here (Hebrew). I don’t know what the implications are. There is usually a lot between the lines in these kinds of rulings.

After three years, a 100,000-strong demonstration against integration in the girls’ school in Emanuel, and numerous statements from the haredi leadership about how it could never compromise on this issue, the daughters of the Slonim hassidim (Ashkenazi) parents in Emanuel will learn with Sephardi children in the coming year, including the ones who had not been admitted to the breakaway school.

Original post:Parents in Emanuel Sent to Jail for Two Weeks

The two sides agreed to abide by the ruling of a rabbinical court in Jerusalem.

The Jerusalem Post reports:

A rabbinical court arbitrating between Yoav Laloum and the Slonim Hassidim of Emmanuel on Sunday ordered Laloum and his Noar Kahalacha NGO to withdraw the petitions they filed with the High Court of Justice, and prohibited ethnically segregated classrooms throughout the Independent Educational Center.

Laloum had petitioned the High Court against the segregation in the Beit Ya’acov school, and later against the parents, who were held in contempt of court for not obeying its ruling to return their daughters to the school once the separate tracks were reunited.

The verdict of the three-man Beit Din Tzedek Jerusalem, headed by Rabbi Avraham Dov Levin, stressed that “all the students in the Independent Education Center must be united together [in the upcoming school-year], unless this court rules otherwise.”

The rabbinical court also prohibited the Slonim Hassidim from inflicting any “verbal or physical harm” on Laloum.

Laloum confirmed to The Jerusalem Post late Sunday night that he would withdraw his petition against the parents if they acceded to the beit din’s terms, and pending the High Court’s acceptance of the overall deal.

The Slonim Hassidim had taken Laloum to Levin’s court after he claimed some 10 days ago that they had accepted funding from The International Fellowship of Christians and Jews.

On Sunday, perhaps following spiritual mentor Rabbi Ya’acov Yosef’s Saturday night announcement that he was ceasing his activities against ethnic discrimination in Emmanuel due to threats made against him, Laloum accepted Levin’s arbitration.

The rabbinical court, like the High Court, prohibited dividing the school.

It’s interesting that the Slonim Hassidim chose this rabbinical court, yet it still ruled against them in the end.

The mothers, who never arrived at the jail, are still in contempt of court.

Earlier on Sunday, the High Court of Justice put off issuing its ruling on whether to imprison the mothers from Emmanuel. It will reach a decision on the matter during a closed hearing on Tuesday.

In its announcement, the court stressed that despite their claims, the parents were well aware of the verdict ordering them to prison issued last Tuesday, and “despite them being provided with many opportunities to fulfill it without coercion, they acted in various ways to thwart [the ruling].”

The court also noted that it took into account requests from parents to cancel or postpone their imprisonment, but fined each of them NIS 5,000 for filing those requests on Friday, after they were supposed to have turned themselves in on Thursday.

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The parents of the “Beit Yaakov Hasidi,” a breakaway girls’ school in the small West Bank town of Emanuel, were found in contempt of court last month for refusing to send their children to an integrated school. They have been sentenced to prison for two weeks, starting tomorrow. The case involves about 40 couples, of whom both parents will be incarcerated.

When I spoke with a mother from Emanuel a few months ago, she insisted that there was no racism because there were children of sephardic [North African] background studying in the break-away school. She claimed that the reason for the separate school was an influx of newly-religious parents into the community. The lifestyle of the newcomers [who were almost exclusively of sephardic origin] did not meet the religious standards of the existing parent body. When the original parents tried to force the newcomers into separate classes, the court ruled against them. The parents set up a separate school, which was also declared illegal. So the original parent body, which consisted of both ashkenazim and sephardim, went on strike. At the time of our conversation, the woman’s daughter and the other girls were studying secretly with a private teacher. When the court later learned about this arrangement, they fined each parent NIS 400 a day.

It’s distressing that parents are less concerned with what their children are learning than with whom they are learning. School choice should mean that parents choose a school based on convenience, curriculum, quality and educational approach. It shouldn’t mean that a group of powerful parents get to decide who is in and who is out. Parents who want complete control over who their children learn with should not expect the government to pay for it.

Still, the parents in Emanuel should not go to jail. They had agreed to withdraw their children from school and educate them at their own expense, unlike other Beit Yaakov and “chinuch atzmai” schools that are partially funded by the government. It’s awful, but where will it end? There are hundreds of home-schooled children in Israel, and the government isn’t sending their parents to jail.

One of the fathers, who is of sephardic origin and has been found in contempt of court, spoke on the radio this morning. He plans to bring his month-old baby to jail with him and his wife. I don’t know who will be watching the other children. This will not make a pretty picture. While I’m not naive enough to believe that this isn’t a case of ethnic discrimination, the court has gone too far and this decision is sure to backfire.

Jerusalem Post article

Photo from Channel 10 via Jpost.

Update Sunday evening, June 20, 2010:

It seems a compromise has been reached. Both sides have agreed to arbitration (borrerut) by a Jerusalem rabbinic court, and the civil suit will be withdrawn. The girls will all learn together, and if there are any problems with specific girls, the rabbinic court will deal with it. This is what my husband heard on the news and Rafi confirmed it. The only links I have seen so far mention the withdrawal of the suit by the sephardi Lalom, but the bigger news is the huge concession on the part of the chasidim.  G-d willing, I’ll post links tomorrow.
Let’s hope that there are no lasting negative effects on the children of Emanuel.

Related:

Principal Threatens Student with Social Isolation

Ethiopian Integration in Petach Tikva Religious Schools

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It is sad that this is happening, and I don’t understand why the parents insist on sending the kid to this school that doesn’t want her. Whatever the reason is, right or wrong, why not just send to another school? There are so many, why davka (specifically) the one that refuses to take you?

I don’t blame the kid, and the school’s behavior is revolting, but some blame must be laid at the feet of the parents as well. Maybe it really is not the right school for this kid and they are simply insisting for stupid reasons.

Parents have all kinds of reasons to send to a particular school. The argument—that parents should not send a child to a school where she is not wanted—must be rejected out of hand. If we accepted this logic then American public schools would still be segregated. Children with physical and mental disabilities would never go to a school with “normal” children. And so on and so on.

Let’s give these parents the benefit of the doubt and assume they considered all their options. Let us also assume they are prepared to give her the emotional support she needs to deal with the situation. After all, who is to say she wouldn’t face a similar attitude in any haredi school she tries to attend? From what I recall of the story, the girl was rejected from several schools. This one is her neighborhood school, which is why it was instructed to take her. Perhaps the parents don’t want to make her travel.

Even if my assumptions are incorrect, what about the next child who receives an unjust rejection? Should her parents also slink away and find another school?

Accusing parents of harming their children, making trouble, or not knowing their place, are classic methods of diverting attention from the issue at hand. Note how the principal blames the mother for the whole situation, including the strike, and asks twice, “What kind of mother [are you]?”

Anything is “kosher” as long as it gets parents to back off.

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Petach Tikva has always been in the forefront of the debate over exclusivity and inclusion in the state religious school system.

Introduction: A Short History of Integration and Private Schools in Petach Tikva

Petach Tikva has both affluent and poor neighborhoods. There has long been bad feeling when integration in elementary school has been “forced.” The resentment increased with the establishment of private schools that drew affluent children from the public religious schools and left a higher percentage of weaker and poorer students in the public system.

This resentment existed even when the socioeconomic, cultural, religious and educational differences between the  two groups being integrated—Ashkenazim and Yemenites, for the most part—were not nearly as great as the differences now seen between the Ethiopian immigrants and the native population. These battles often made the papers, including twice when two of my older children started first grade as my youngest child will (might) tomorrow. The battles are still fresh in our minds, and their aftermath affects private relationships, the social fabric of the religious community and the city itself, and every child in religious schools today.

The private schools receive about 70% of their funding from the educational ministry, which allocates a set amount per student no matter what school they attend, and from the municipality. All of them study rent-free on public land, and one of them received a state-of-the-art building. True, children in that school learned in leaky caravans for many years, but potential parents only see the new building that is much more attractive than my children’s adequate state-religious school.

The Ethiopian Immigrants and the Religious Issue

The rabbinate’s requirements for conversion of the Ethiopian immigrant children includes their enrollment in a religious school. Large numbers of immigrants have moved in recent years to Petach Tikva, including 290 children who arrived over the summer and 80-120 expected after the fall holidays. These children were assigned to both state religious and private schools, but the private schools have refused to accept them.

Concerns of the State Religious Schools

There are two main reasons why the religious public schools in Petach Tikva insist that the exclusive, private schools accept a proportionate number of Ethiopian students:

• The private schools serve as unfair competition to the religious school system. Private schools have already led to the demise or near-demise of several state religious schools. Obligating the state religious schools to take large groups of weaker students puts the schools at even more of a disadvantage when parents are considering their options.
• If parents want to separate themselves from the community and only learn with their own kind, they should pay the real price for this privilege. Public funds should not go toward schools whose main interest is not in a particular type of education, but in keeping some children out.

Ronit Tirosh’s View

Kadima’s Ronit Tirosh, the director of the education ministry, said on the radio that the concern of the public religious schools is that if large numbers of Ethiopians are absorbed into their system, parents with means will either migrate to private schools or leave to another school district. This has happened in at least one Petach Tikva school and in Or Yehuda, Netanya and elsewhere. If  the Ethiopians become the majority the whole point of their integration, to absorb them into mainstream Israeli society, is negated.

There are only five state religious schools in Petach Tikva and three private ones. Tirosh advocates a solution that places the children in the larger, non-religious state school system and distributes new immigrants in smaller groups among more municipalities so as not to overwhelm any one system.

Concerns of the Private Schools

The private schools, for their part, maintain that their concern is pedagogical and not racial. The higher religious and (supposedly) higher academic level means that the immigrants will not fit in. But due to their lack of Hebrew and limited knowledge of Judaism they are likely to have a difficult time in any school, especially a religious one. The differences between the curriculum of the public and private schools is exaggerated. In other words, they won’t fit in to the state religious schools any more than into the private ones.

The private schools insist that the children will be better off in separate classes until they can catch up. This may or may not be true, but I doubt that the interest of the Ethiopian children is behind this assertion.

The private schools also ask why the many haredi schools in the city have not been pressured to accept more students or threatened with closure, as the private schools have.

For the record, both private  school and public school parents benefit when there is competition between them. Parents often find that a particular school does not meet their needs, or the private school rejects their children even though the family is a good match. And in theory, competition can lead to better education.

Some of the solutions suggested by the private schools involve testing or interviewing new immigrants before assigning them to a school. The state religious schools have rejected these options because it would mean taking the stronger ones, whether on the basis of religious level, academic level, or behavior, and leaving the ones with problems for the state religious school to deal with. The original distribution by the city was according to last name.

Where It Stands Now

I’m off to my child’s meeting with the new first-grade teacher. As of now, no solution has been reached and all of the public schools in Petach Tikva, religious or not, are threatening to strike. At least two of the private schools have also suspended classes during the crisis. Let’s hope this can be resolved to everyone’s satisfaction and that all of the country’s children can start school as scheduled.

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And Haveil Havalim is up at DovBear.

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You can find the Hebrew proposal on its website.

Suggestions:

• Quality supplemental, educational and fun frameworks for the summer holidays, subsidized by the government, municipalities, and independent organizations. “Working Parents for Change” has initiated contact with the umbrella organization of community centers. The goal is to include values currently lacking in the educational system.
• Increase the number of vacation days for workers through legislation, and development of a code for fair employment.
• Shortening summer vacation by two weeks (currently kids are off all of July and August), Passover vacation by one week, and abolishing the days off for “Isru Chag.” [Isru Chag is the day after the holidays of Passover, Sukkot (Tabernacles) and Shavuot (Pentecost). ] Knesset Member Michael Melchior, chairman of the education committee, is working on introducing the law to the Knesset. [I'm surprised they want to leave the week of Chanukah alone.]

I’ve adjusted to the current schedule, and don’t even complain about isru chag any more. I’m happy not to have to get my kids out early the day after a holiday, and rely on my kids for Pesach cleaning. But parents working outside the home have a huge amount of pressure this time of year. Even with the extra vacation day workers may be more productive when they know their kids are cared for.

On the other hand, if the school system is so bad as the organization implies in its first point, pushing for more school days seems counterproductive.  And I wonder what teachers  think of the idea.

What do you think?

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Yet the school exhibits some cognitive dissonance when it comes to the environment. I’ve already written about the ridiculous amount of school supplies and multicolored folders required for each child. After the environmental event kids were asked to bring in yet another plastic folder–this time green, along with writing paper and nylonim (clear plastic page covers)–for a unit about the environment. I recently noticed the unused folder in my son’s backpack. He thinks the teacher forgot about it.

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How to find information:

• Ask parents with children in the school. Keep in mind that their information will be biased. Once children are settled in a school, parents sometimes need to justify their decision to themselves and may minimize issues. They may also have an interest in encouraging parents to send to their school. And not all parents are equally aware of a school’s internal problems.
• Ask parents who chose to send to different schools. I find that you can learn the most from parents who had children in a school you are considering, but pulled them out or chose a different school for subsequent children. Of course, such parents have their own biases. Sometimes they blame a school for issues that it could not control.
• Talk to teachers, volunteers, and others who have interaction with the schools. Do they have biases too? You bet.
• The school itself. Go to the open house for prospective parents, read its literature and website, visit classes, and schedule a meeting with the principal. A school may gloss over problems, but it’s important to see how it presents itself to prospective parents.

Below are suggestions of questions to ask. You won’t want to ask every question to every school, but you need to decide what matters to you. As you talk to other parents, you will get more ideas.

Technical concerns

• Location. Don’t discount convenience. An extra hour of commuting is hard on the whole family and adds cost–make sure it’s worth it. Or it may be a convenience, because it means less babysitting time. If your child will travel on a school bus, check that there is appropriate supervision and safety measures including seat belts and insurance.
• Facilities. Is the school clean, including the bathrooms? Is there room outside to play? Ask about a library, computers, and sports facilities.
• School schedule. Find out about half-days, afterschool programs, and extra-curricular activities.
• Fees. Include tuition, insurance, school supplies, meals, transportation, gifts for staff, and class activities. Ask if there are scholarships and how they are distributed.
• Class setup. How many kids are in a class? If there is more than one class in a grade, how are they divided? Will the class stay together, or are they redistributed each year? Are classes split up for certain subjects and if so, are they split randomly or by level?

General Concerns

• Violence, “behavior” problems, and learning issues. Despite strict admission standards, there will be kids who hit or disrupt class. You need to learn how the school deals with these issues. What is their policy regarding violence–and is the policy followed consistently? Can the school accommodate children with learning disabilities or giftedness? If the school employs a counselor or psychologist, how often are they present?

• Access. How easy is it to reach the school and talk to staff and are they pleasant? I’ve encountered schools that don’t answer the phone, making me wonder how I could reach my child in an emergency.
• Atmosphere. How do you feel when you are in the school–tense or calm? What is happening in the halls–are kids running around or working quietly? Listen to the way the administration speaks with staff, and the staff with students. Is the principal or vice-principal on-site and accessible?
  
• Student body. How diverse is it? Even parents who value exposure to other lifestyles and cultures may draw the line at their child being the “only one” in a particular category. Will your child know anyone in his or her class? It’s not necessary for a child to go with a large group but it helps to know one or two children from before. Are you comfortable with the parents in the school?
• Staff. Is recess well-supervised? What happens when a teacher can’t come and a substitute isn’t available? What are the teachers’ qualifications? Do teachers send their own kids to the school? In a religious school, find out whether the school’s outlook match that of the teachers and parent body.
• Management and organization. Look for a school where the staff works together, with the administration in control. Are parents notified of events well in advance, and if so, do the dates stick?
• Gender equality. If the school has separate classes for boys and girls, are there differences in class hours, facilities and curriculum?
• Curriculum. Find out what kids are learning, at all grade levels, and with what texts. How many teachers does the child see each week? Ask how much homework is expected per grade level? What methods are used and how are special needs accommodated?
• Graduates. Where do most of the students continue their studies?
• Admission standards. Who is admitted into the school? If there is testing, who administers it and are the tests used for any other purpose? Sometimes, standards are lowered for younger siblings of current students. This is one area where the school may not tell you the whole story.
• Does the school suit your child? You might prefer a prestigious school, but the child would suffer from too much academic pressure. A school that is right-wing religiously could create a conflict for a child whose family is less observant than the school standard.

So loyal readers, what is important to you when choosing a school? Let me know what I forgot.

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One problem that parents encounter is that in families where there are both older and very young children, the toddlers and infants often require many hours a day of the parents’ care and leave little time left over to work with the older ones.

I think the comment reflects misconceptions both about homeschooling and large families.

When people learn that I have six children they often say, “Wow, I could never do that.” I respond that I didn’t have them all at once. I wrote the following somewhat idealized picture of life as parents of a large family:

Let’s imagine a couple whose first baby is called Noa. A first baby takes up your whole world. Noa’s parents, Tal and Talia, examine every bowel movement with a microscope, count minutes between feedings, and agonize over which toys are most educational. This is not (only) because they are silly, doting new parents, but because they genuinely have a lot to learn about babies. There’s no shortcut for this learning and decision-making process, which continues, more or less, as Noa goes through every new stage of development.

Then little Noah comes along. Noah’s sleep patterns, temperament and bowel movements are completely different from Noa’s, but Tal and Talia already have knowledge and experience. Noa, however, is an active toddler and needs even more attention than Noah. While Noah’s needs can be met by holding and feeding, Noa needs someone to talk to her, read to her, take her outside, prepare her meals and clean up after her, and watch that she doesn’t climb up the bookcase. And she hugs Noah too hard when she thinks no one is looking. So while Tal and Talia thought taking care of one newborn was a fulltime job, taking care of both children together feels like it require superhuman powers.

[So parents with two small children might assume that adding a few older children to the mix would make a productive activity like homeschooling pretty much impossible.]

But this is only the beginning of the story. Tal and Talia adjust to having two children. Talia recovers from the birth, Noah begins to follow some sort of schedule, and Noa grows in her understanding and self-control. Sure, there are crises of all kinds such as illness, a family wedding, and a house move, but Tal and Talia get to know their kids, they learn shortcuts for household chores, and they gain confidence.

By the time little Roni comes along (a girl), things get harder before they get easier. But experience helps, and stages that a four, five or six-year-old undergoes tend to be less draining that baby/toddler issues. Every birth has its challenges, and very fussy babies can throw a wrench into family life. Still, this stage passes. Over the years Tal and Talia begin to work out their parenting style and things fall into a groove.

When the fourth child Ido is born, Tal and Talia are so experienced that they don’t worry so much about the baby. They instinctively pick him up when he cries and change diapers with one hand. When Noa was born, she interacted only with Tal and Talia. But Ido enjoys watching the older children, who can even keep an eye on him for a short time (unless the spacing is very close–I’m assuming a spacing of two to four years after the second child).

Around that time, Talia, who manages the day-to-day running of the household, decides to become much more efficient. She reads up on housekeeping subjects, consults with friends, and makes the required changes. Tal and Talia reevaluate their priorities in terms of time and money–regarding extracurricular activities, housekeeping, schooling, and food and clothing expenses. They make difficult choices, just like every other family.

At some point the balance in the family shifts when Noa can run errands on foot, help significantly with household chores, and share in the care of the younger children. The younger children are growing too–they dress and feed themselves, and manage their belongings. Even if the children are closely spaced, the older children still get to the point where they don’t require so much physical care.

When Noa becomes a teen Tal and Talia have another baby named Amit. The couple can go out for the evening, taking the baby with them and leaving the four older children at home. They have teen issues, but because they are a close family and have been sensitive to their children’s needs all along, they handle them relatively well.

Having a large family is physically and psychologically demanding. Tal and Talia are not as available for social activities. Their lifestyle is different from that of their friends with one or two children. But they do make time for each other and for the activities that are important to them, taking into account their children’s needs. They prepare for the day when their children will be grown.

In a large family, children do not get constant undivided attention. This doesn’t mean that they are neglected. There are two levels of parental care: availability, the level depending on the age and needs of the child, and one-on-one interaction, which occurs less frequently. In a large family some of the children’s needs for interaction are met by the other siblings. And a large chunk of time involves most of the family spending time together, playing or working.

I’ll let my homeschooling readers correct me if I’m wrong, but homeschooling also does not require continuous one-on-one teaching. Most Israeli homeschoolers practice “unschooling.” They don’t follow a set curriculum, but let the child set the pace. They rely on a child’s natural curiosity, providing learning materials when a child expresses interest in a particular subject. But even parents who choose a curriculum-based approach don’t sit with the child for hours on end. They might explain a concept to the child and have him work it out on his own. When a child misses school, how long does it take to make up the material? Two hours at most, and the parent does not need to sit with the child for all that time. Homeschooling is about much more, though, than curriculum, and I can think of many benefits of homeschooling for large families.

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My daughter entered ninth grade this year. This year she has “the best teacher and the best class.” She was able to request a number of friends, and they’ll be together for the next four years.

Her school has six grades, each with about eight classes of thirty girls. The six grades are divided into three batim (lit. houses), each with its own building, vice-principal, secretary, advisor, and two teachers who serve as grade-level coordinators.

The school operates several large volunteer projects:

1. All ninth graders volunteer in a public gan (kindergarten) once a week. My daughter catches a van from school at 7:30 to take her across town, where she assists the teacher for two hours. Girls coming from out of town, like the ones in my younger daughter’s gan, volunteer close to the school so they don’t have to commute twice. They gave the girls (unfortunately bright green) t-shirts so they will be recognized. Good marketing, so long as I don’t have to wear that color.
2. The school runs a country-wide organization to collect used appliances and furniture and redistribute them to the needy. Seventh-graders work in the warehouse; during the summer my daughter took a few shifts answering the phone to schedule pickups.
3. Students volunteer in the special-education gan right on school premises. My daughter hasn’t worked there yet, but girls in her class have.

The school is handicapped accessible, has an ethnically heterogeneous population (Jewishly speaking), and boasts the third highest bagrut (matriculation exam) scores in the country, after two secular schools in Haifa. It discourages graduates from enlisting in the army but many still do (my daughter isn’t interested).

When my kids were younger someone told me that I would be happier with the girls’ schools in Israel than the boys’. The girls don’t have the pressure of gemara (Talmud), leaving little time for anything except the bagrut requirements.

[I tried to stay positive all the way through.]

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