In honor of the nine days of mourning leading up to the commemoration of the destruction of the Temple on 9 Av, which we observe this Sunday, I share this email from a reader. A very close friend of ours died about a month ago and last week our rabbi's adult son died.there has been talk of funerals and shiva and sadness and crying in our house. My six year old son has heard some of these conversations. He has also helped to prepare meals for the shiva for both families and went with me to deliver the meal to our close friend(where he just sat on her lap and cuddled with her--which was what she really needed then) he has started asking a lot of questions about heaven, G-d etc. Things … [Read more...]
Thoughts from the Shiva
April 7, 2011 by 35 Comments
Update: I added one tip at the end. When someone dies people are often unsure what to do and how to help. I just got up from shiva, the week-long mourning period for my father, and I thought it might be useful to record some of my experiences. I appreciated every call, message, visit and offer of help. My father died in New York on Tuesday, and my sister and brothers arrived midday Thursday for the burial here in Israel. I called one local friend, ET, who notified the rest of the English-speaking Emunah chapter. When these women spring into action there's no stopping them. I very much appreciated the phone calls and offers of help before the funeral. I had a feeling of numbness and … [Read more...]
Notes from a Granddaughter
April 1, 2011 by 14 Comments
My niece, Tzipora Wacholder, gave me permission to post her memories of my father, Ben Zion Wacholder z"l. More memories will be shared on the Ben Zion Wacholder z"l memorial page, to be maintained by my niece Shifra. You can send material or links to bzwacholdermemories@gmail.com. My Zaidy: You were a wonderful grandfather. You did so much for all of us and showered us with love and attention. You cared that we should think and learn and grow. You exemplified the phrase —œlifelong learner— and were able to communicate that to all of your descendants. I was happy to have introduced myself to you one last time. The conversation we had, each time I came to visit, replays … [Read more...]
Sad News
March 30, 2011 by 66 Comments
I am sorry to report the death of my father, Dr. Ben Zion Wacholder, today in NY. The funeral will take place in New York tomorrow (Wednesday), followed by burial here in Israel on Thursday. Shiva (mourning at home) will be through Wednesday morning. Baruch Dayan Haemet--Blessed is the true judge. … [Read more...]
Sad News
April 25, 2010 by 3 Comments
I just learned that Helene, a frequent commenter on a Mother in Israel, died last week in California after a long fight with cancer. I didn't know her well, but always enjoyed Helene's spicy comments about the joys and benefits of breastfeeding, cooking, and homeschooling. She loved Judaism and was immensely proud of her grown daughter. I know that my readers join me in sending condolences to Helene's family. May her memory be for a blessing. Photo credit: Moncho71 … [Read more...]
Sad News (Updated)
April 8, 2010 by 3 Comments
I just saw an announcement about the death of Baila's father. Baila, I'm so sorry. Update: Baila will be sitting shiva in Modiin for one day only, on Tuesday, starting at 9 am. Contact me for the address at mominisrael at gmail.com … [Read more...]
A Subdued Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur
October 9, 2008 by 7 Comments
A member of our shul, a mother of five, lost her fight with cancer on the first night of Rosh Hashana. When the family realized that her death was near, they checked her into the hospital and stayed with her. Had she died at home, the burial would have taken place on Yom Tov with the family walking to the local cemetery. But the hospital storage facilities allowed the funeral to be postponed until Motzei Rosh Hashanah. Close to a thousand people attended including the mayor, whose son had been her student. When my own mother died I learned that most people continue to leave shul during the Yizkor memorial prayer until after the year of mourning. We found that there was not much basis for … [Read more...]
Who are you waiting for, Miss America? Guess not.
September 9, 2008 by Leave a Comment
Last night we went to the shiva for the mother of an old friend. The friend told how her mother's mother studied piano with Bess Myerson, the first (and only?) Jewish Miss America. My friend's great-grandmother tried to fix up one of her sons with Bess, but they weren't interested. If I have it right, this great-grandmother was American-born, and attended Hunter College in the 1890's. When her future husband, a Polish immigrant, was looking for a shidduch, he asked for a "religious, American-born girl." The great-grandmother agreed to marry him on condition that he close his factory on Shabbat. Apparently, being "religious" in those days did not include strict Sabbath observance. … [Read more...]
(Mis)Adventures in International Travel: A long life
August 1, 2008 by 2 Comments
A year ago my sister's energetic and charismatic mother-in-law, still living on her own, was diagnosed with incurable cancer. It was sad to hear of this 96-year-old woman suffering at the end of life.My sister called a few days before my trip to tell me that her mother-in-law had stopped eating. She died at her home the morning I arrived.Usually I stay in New York when I visit, but this year I had arranged to visit my brother in Washington. He agreed to have us come a week earlier than planned, so I changed our reservations in order to leave after the funeral the next day. After paying the airline's fee, we received e-tickets with the new dates. We would return to New York after the bulk of … [Read more...]
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