Dads Who Don’t Change Diapers

Recently, while I was out with a group of women friends, “G” got a call on her cell phone. She told the caller that she was on her way. It turns out that her grandson needed a change, and her daughter had gone to a concert with friends. Her son-in-law doesn’t change diapers. When one of the other women (“M”) commented, G said, “What do you want, that my daughter shouldn’t go out?” M replied that this was between the couple and she should leave it to them.

The most interesting part of the story is that this young couple has not only a baby, but older twins as well. How the father managed to survive newborn twins with his marriage intact while never changing a diaper, I can only imagine.


  1. Anonymous says

    I’ve heard of a father of five grown children who has never changed a diaper. Those dads are lazy bums. Or maybe Rav SoAndSo never changed a diaper either, so it must be a holy thing, a kiddush hashem!

  2. A father in this generation who doesn’t change diapers is truly an anomaly. That being said, my dad didn’t do it. One of my brothers probably changes the majority of the household diapers. And the other brother makes himself seem totally helpless and says things to his wife like, “Where in his desk (changing table) do you keep the clean diapers?”
    My husband thankfully is not fazed by diaper changing. I do have a friend, however, who has a nervous fear that her husband will clean the baby’s bottom incorrectly and cause an infection – and never lets him change diapers (though, being reasonably intelligent, I’m sure he could master the nuances easily 🙂
    With all this diaper talk, I think someone over here smells!

  3. you have to be a dad to understand how he gets away wih it

  4. I believe my husband changes nearly every diaper when he is hope. What a great guy if I say so myself!
    As for the Grandmother who rushed out, I don’t think she is giving her daughter any help. Her daughter should be able to get out (and so should the grandmother). The son-in-law should learn to change a diaper.
    Interestingly enough, my husband wasn’t too in favor of changing diapers either when we first became parents, but his sister put him up to it with a challenge and he went to prove that he could do this domestic chore. He has been changing diapers ever since.

  5. mominisrael says

    Anon–interesting theory.
    RM–I’m pretty sure my father never did it either.
    Rafi–that method must appear in one of the fathering books I haven’t read (see comments on previous post)
    SL–sisters-in-law can be so useful!

  6. Eugene Gershin says

    Hi! Please grab anti-Olmert’s Purim buttons from
    The buttons are free and could be hotlinked. Let’s make some fun of Olmert!

  7. Ari Kinsberg says

    a purim joke, no?

  8. mominisrael says

    Ari, unfortunately not.

  9. As a father who changes very few diapers. Some of us have a gag reflex as we are changing them (especially those that grandma likes to call a beauty). I will try to conquer the reflex if there is no choice (sometime not successful and includes a visit to the porcelean palace in the middle or when done). So don’t judge, if he had to call someone out of the home to do it, it’s probably not laziness.

  10. mominisrael says

    Rescue, thanks for giving a different perspective.
    I think many of us had this problem before we had children, and we got over it. Have you considered seeking psychological treatment (if you haven’t yet)? I am guessing that you believe that this is a physical and unpreventable problem, but a professional may tell you differently.

  11. You must be talking about my brother-in-law- he’s never changed a diaper in his life and doesn’t plan to! It really offends me for some reason- how DARE he?
    Thank goodness my husband (his brother) is the complete opposite. A more involved, hands-on Abba you’d never find!

  12. He is my hero. 😉

  13. mominisrael says

    RR: Who knows, maybe he is your BIL.
    Jack, calling your mother-in-law across town to change your own kid’s diaper does not qualify as heroic.

  14. Baleboosteh says

    Not changing the diapers while his wife is home is one thing, but to have to call someone in to do it because his wife is out… thats a whole different thing!

  15. mominisrael says

    Baleboosteh–I’m with you there.

  16. Ick! My own father always bragged that he never changed a diaper in his life. To me that was nothing to brag about and I knew I would not marry a guy who wouldn’t share in childcare responsibilities. B”H I married a diaper changer! 🙂

  17. mominisrael says

    Actually, my oldest son said my friend shouldn’t have married off her daughter to someone like that (no offense to rescue above).

  18. Anonymous says

    Times change. My father can boil water and fry an egg, he says that his father did not know which cabinets in his kitchen were for milchig an which were for fleishig, I can cook and bake just about anything (although I rarely do these days.
    I doubt if either one of them ever changed a diaper, I’ve changed plenty.
    proof positive of hiskatnu hadoros.

  19. My father changed diapers when I was a baby. Cloth diapers with pins… and he’s totally blind! We have pity on him and don’t make him change the diapers of his grandkids, but I’m sure he could manage it if I asked him to.
    My husband changes the majority of diapers when he’s home, because I said he had to. (Actually, I said I change more than he does because I’m home more awake hours, and he has a lot of catching up to do.)

  20. mominisrael says

    I suspect my father, who is legally blind, never changed a diaper in his life!